Southridge Community Church pastor Jeff Lockyer responds after his church is removed from the Ontario Conference of Mennonite Brethren Churches

 

 

Southridge Community Church lead pastor Jeff Lockyer reflects on his church’s journey to becoming welcoming and affirming of LGBTQ+ as a “Love Beyond Belief” community, and its resulting removal from the Ontario Mennonite Brethren Conference (ONMB). Southridge is located in St. Catharines, Ont. 

“I don’t give a sh** what you believe. We’ve got to stop the suicides.” 

That’s what an LGBTQ+ community leader from St. Catharines, Ont. told Jeff Lockyer, pastor of Southridge Community Church, back in 2005, citing research that showed LGBTQ+ youth who grew up in religious homes where homosexuality was viewed unfavourably were more likely to try to kill themselves. 

The two had met for a discussion about Christianity and homosexuality. Lockyer, who had been one of the pastors of the Mennonite Brethren church since 1997, wanted to learn more about how his congregation could serve Queer people—and explain what Christian churches had believed for centuries on the topic of homosexuality. 

That comment had a profound impact on Lockyer. 

“I realized that day our church needed to do whatever it could to make our community better and safer for members of the LGBTQ+ community,” he said. 

Fast forward to November 2022 when Southridge, which has been part of the Ontario Conference of Mennonite Brethren Churches (ONMB) since its inception in 1980 (as a plant from three Niagara Region MB churches), was suspended by the Conference for “publicly communicating its intention to invite members of the LGBTQ+ community into all levels of participation, leadership and decision-making within the church.” 

The journey from that conversation in 2005 to suspension in 2022 includes how the church decided to focus on the realities of marginalization—causes like homelessness, food insecurity and migrant farmworkers.    

That growing sensitivity to marginalization also drove them to become better relatives with the Indigenous community, and also to become more effective at empowering women in leadership. 

At the same time, it caused them to think about how Southridge could be a safer place for members of the LGBTQ+ community. 

Through that initial conversation, Lockyer became aware of the pain the church caused for many Queer people. 

“I had been awakened to their marginalization and vulnerability, and how they had been harmed and completely ignored by many churches,” he said. 

Finding a way for Southridge to come alongside them was “a natural part of our process of caring for people on the margins.” 

The church quietly explored the topic until 2016. That’s when Lockyer raised the topic of LGBTQ+ inclusion in the church with conference leaders. 

There were objections. “They revolved around the biblical definition of marriage, and how people read the Bible, as interpreted and expressed through the Confession of Faith,” he said.

The church continued discussing the topic among its leadership and membership, ultimately discerning, in the summer of 2019, that interpretations on the biblical view of marriage were not essential components to experiencing salvation or growing in relationship with Jesus. 

“We saw it as a disputable matter, one where people in our Mennonite Brethren church family could disagree but still be in fellowship,” he said. 

The Conference pushed back. 

“We were told we couldn’t do that,” he said. “They said the biblical definition of marriage was not allowed to be treated as disputable, since it was a Confessional issue as Mennonite Brethren.” 

Rather than create more conflict, Southridge sought to stay in the space that was allowed it by ONMB leaders at the time. “We wanted to remain in good standing in the Conference, and also out of respect for Ed Willms, the Ontario Conference Executive Director,” he said. 

“Ed made us feel welcome to talk about it, he was open and curious,” said Lockyer, adding the senior leaders of Southridge agreed not to preach against the Confession, not to teach an affirming view and not conduct a same-sex marriage. 

“We value our relationships in the Conference,” Lockyer said. “If making those concessions kept us at the table, we were willing to do that.” 

In early 2020, just before the pandemic hit, this decision was also communicated with members of the LGBTQ+ community. “They understood our dilemma and were good with it,” he said. 

The church hoped to keep the discussion going with the Conference. But the pandemic brought many things to a halt, including any conversations between Southridge and Conference leaders. 

In the meantime, the congregation continued to experience increased urgency to effectively serve members of the LGBTQ+ community. 

Then, in the summer of 2022, the church asked Willms if there would be any space in the Conference for churches to treat the Confessional article on marriage more disputably.   

On September 13, Lockyer was invited by Willms to share Southridge’s story as part of  a Conference listening day, an invitation-only meeting of Ontario Mennonite Brethren pastors and leaders. 

“I thought it was a healthy, honest and diverse discussion,” Lockyer said. “I was proud of the Conference. I don’t know if a similar official conversation like that had ever happened among Mennonite Brethren before.” 

Two days later, the ONMB Board met, and heard from a number of member churches that no additional space for these types of conversations was to be made. 

“After the listening day, it felt like there were only two choices, compliance or ex-communication,” Lockyer said. 

A few weeks later, Willms was terminated as ONMB Executive Director. Shortly afterwards Southridge received notice it was suspended, effective November 5, along with FreeChurch Toronto, which also welcomes and affirms LGBTQ+ people. 

Unless Southridge and FreeChurch changed their minds, the suspensions would lead to removal of membership in the Conference at the 2023 convention. 

Lockyer was disappointed by that decision. On the listening day, he had suggested ways for Southridge to stay in a relationship with the Conference while still disagreeing on this topic—such as staying a member but not being able to vote or have leaders of the church serve on Conference committees. 

“We told them we could be like an adherent in a congregation, someone who belongs but doesn’t have the privileges of membership,” Lockyer said. 

Members of Southridge would still go to conventions, share in the mission, support conference projects, and benefit from being in relationship with others. “We were hoping our family of churches could function the way each of our local church families does,” he said. 

Leaders at the church who were credentialed were also willing to give up their credentials, he said, if it meant paving the way for safer space for LGBTQ+ people. 

“We would do that to stay in relationship with the Conference,” said Lockyer. “The relationship meant that much. But the answer was still no.” 

On February 25, at the annual Conference convention, Southridge was removed from membership along with FreeChurch. 

For Lockyer, the decision is saddening. 

“We didn’t want to leave the Conference. We wanted to stay. I’ve been a pastor in it for 25 years.” 

For him, the removal reflects a different way of doing church by the Conference. 

“When I was credentialed 25 years ago, the most important thing for the Conference was working together in a shared mission, based on long-standing shared relationship. Today it is primarily, if not exclusively about shared belief—that’s the most important thing. The Confession is now viewed as the ‘permission to play’ for all the rest of the family dynamics. Anything that deviates from that belief is a deal breaker,” he said. 

For him, that’s a flawed way to do church. 

“Nobody ever agrees on everything,” he said, comparing the Conference to a family. “In a family we disagree, but we still accept and love each other. We don’t want to see anyone leave or be left out.” 

While sorry about the removal of the church’s membership, Lockyer is still hopeful the Conference will come around on this topic. 

“Fifty years ago, there was no space to discuss women in leadership, but we have resolved that,” he said. “Twenty years ago, it was about divorce and the remarriage of divorced people, and we got through that, too. Our theology evolved.” 

At the same time, Lockyer is sympathetic to Conference leaders. 

“They were in a bind with some churches threatening to leave if they created space for this conversation,” he said. 

As for Southridge, “we just want to incarnate Jesus in our community. We want to be for the people Jesus was most for,” he said. “That’s the single direction we are moving in.” 

Following the vote, Southridge is now a non-denominational church—but one with close ties to the Mennonite Brethren Conference. “We will relate to the Conference as much as we are able,” he said, adding the ties run deep. 

“You can take the church out of the Conference, but you can’t take the Conference out of the church,” he said. 

As for Lockyer, “In my heart I am Anabaptist. I see it as a wide-tent way of doing church, of welcoming all to the table. The more people at the table, the better we all are.”

ONMB did not release the vote total for removing Southridge and FreeChurch Toronto from membership, but a two-thirds majority is required for it to pass.