Opinion: Of the German language and welcoming LGBTQ+ people

“How dare you tell us what language we can speak!” 

That’s what a dear old saint said to me, her wrinkled finger waving menacingly in front of my face. 

It was the late 1970s. I was a relatively new member of the Mennonite Brethren conference, one of a few who came to the denomination from outside of traditional family ties—one of the “English.” 

A student at Mennonite Brethren Bible College, I was invited to go to the national conference assembly in Three Hills, Alberta to both observe and participate. 

The first evening of the gathering, people who spoke from the podium, and went to the floor mics, sometimes spoke German. 

That’s when I, in my early 20s, went to a mic full of trepidation and asked if people would kindly refrain from speaking German since some of us didn’t understand it—or to translate, if they did. 

Which prompted the reaction after the evening session, the tiny woman seeking me out and letting me know, in no uncertain terms, how unwelcome my comments had been for her. 

I can still picture the incident in my mind, 45 or so years ago. 

Today it is rare to hear German spoken in an MB church, and many people with “non-Mennonite” names have called the denomination their home. 

But back then, people like me—“Mennonites by choice,” as we were called—could struggle at times to feel welcome and fit in. 

For starters, it felt like everyone in the church was related. Then there was the insider knowledge about how things worked. 

And the music! Sure, four-part harmony sounded beautiful, but  if you couldn't sing you were immediately an outsider. The first time I stood up to sing in my new MB church I heard all these parts I didn't recognize around me and I stopped. I didn't try singing for months. 

(Churches that prize four-part singing have no idea how quickly it excludes many who grew up outside of those churches, and don't know how to sing. Those notes are a foreign language that only the insiders can read. Today, in most MB churches, anyway, it would be just as rare to hear four-part harmony as German. For them, both languages are now relics of the past.)

To be clear, nobody consciously tried to make me feel unwelcome. (Except that dear old saint.) They were glad I was there. I was glad to be there.

But newcomers like me could still sometimes feel like we weren't really part of the family, unless we made all the effort to fit in.

I mention this because the same may be true today for churches that decide to become welcoming and affirming of LGBTQ+ people. 

As I wrote in the Winnipeg Free Press on Oct. 21, the decision to welcome LGBTQ+ today, like the decision to welcome non-traditional Mennonites back then, is just the first step.

As David Driedger, lead minister of First Mennonite Church in Winnipeg put it when that church decided in 2017 to be welcoming and affirming: "There was a temptation to think we’d arrived” and no more needed to be done. 

But that was just the start of the conversation, he went on to say.

“If you think of a church like a house, and you invite people into your house, the next question is to reassess the house rules and accessibility,” he said. “What are the implicit and explicit things that make people truly feel welcome or not?”

That’s a good question. Answers include taking a close look at the language used in services, how the Bible is read and interpreted, and what hymns and songs are sung—among other things.

People interested in that topic can find out more at “Queer Theology and the Church: After the Affirmation,” a series of four Sunday evening in-person and livestreamed conversations sponsored by First Mennonite about ways churches can make sure LGBTQ+ people feel fully included.

The free series, which starts October 23 at 7 p.m., will cover topics such as “Queer theology and inclusion;” “A trauma-informed and justice-making approach to Christian theology;” “Worshipping the (W)holy other: queer theology in our hymns and confessions;” and “Undressed and undone: how sex and holiness change everything.”

As someone who sometimes struggled to feel welcome in the MB denomination years ago, I get it. Now it is being repeated as some churches seek to welcome a new kind of newcomer: LGBTQ+ people.

 

More information can be found at https://firstmennonitechurch.ca/special-events/