Parents to share about joy of having LGBTQ+ children at June 8 A Time to Listen

 

For Dora Dueck, being the parent of an LGBTQ+ child is an opportunity to gain many gifts.

“All children are a gift,” said Dueck, formerly an editor at the Mennonite Brethren Herald. But being the parent of an LGBTQ+ child means there are “many other additional gifts she has given me.” 

Among the gifts she and her late husband, Helmut, received after their daughter came out in 2009 were becoming part of a new community of LGBTQ+ people and their parents and siblings; of learning new things and growing in their faith; and of growing closer to God. 

“The church environment can sometimes be very dark for LGBTQ+ people and their families,”  said Dueck, an author who lives in B.C. 

“There can be so much fear and anxiety and marginalization. But the great thing about becoming part of a marginalized group is discovering Jesus is there.” 

Dueck, who formerly attended Cedar Park Church, a Mennonite Brethren congregation in Ladner, B.C., will share her story of receiving gifts from her gay daughter on June 8 at the next A Time to Listen. 

Click here to get the link to the Zoom presentation, which will feature other parents with LGBTQ+ children who will also share about the joy their children bring to their lives. 

“It can be good for other parents of LGBTQ+ children to hear from someone who is further along,” she said. “It’s a good news story.” 

For her and her husband, their daughter’s coming out was not a crisis of faith, but it was a “crisis of church.” 

The church environment can “sometimes be very dark,” she said. But outside of that environment is “wonderful community of gay people and their allies.” 

Another gift, she said, was that of watching her daughter flourish with their acceptance. 

“We accepted her immediately after she told us,” Dueck said. “It’s been a gift to watching her thrive as they be who they truly are.” 

Telling stories like that is one of the important goals of A Time to Listen said organizer Aimee Reimer, who is part of Lendrum Mennonite Church, a Mennonite Brethren congregation in Edmonton. 

“It’s important to tell the stories of family members, too,” she said. “Many have also experienced pain of a different kind, but also joy, too.” 

Since starting a year ago, about 1,600 people have tuned into the four A Time to Listen episodes—either live or listening to the recordings afterwards. 

The goal, said Reimer, is to “create space to have conversation, where people could listen and broaden their horizons about this topic.” 

Along with creating that space, A Time To Listen also wants to help create community for LGBTQ+ people and their allies in the Mennonite Brethren denomination, said organizer Isaiah Ritzmann of Waterloo, Ont. 

Many people in Mennonite Brethren congregations who are interested in this topic, or who want to learn more, “have no place to connect, no supportive community,” said Ritzmann, who formerly was a member of a Mennonite Brethren congregation. 

Through A Time to Listen, Mennonite Brethren from across Canada can “build community and do things together,” he said, adding that it can create another form of community “when the church is not what it needs to be.” 

The two acknowledge A Time to Listen also wants to influence Mennonite Brethren conference leaders by inviting them to hear the stories. But, so far, very few have attended. 

“We hear they are listening to recordings afterwards,” said Reimer, suggesting it might be too dangerous for them to be seen at the live events.